


hates the fall.

by Whouffle



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cutting, M/M, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-01
Updated: 2014-11-01
Packaged: 2018-02-23 12:53:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2548190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whouffle/pseuds/Whouffle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>jake and dirk were like puzzle pieces. without each other they were useless and but together, they were strong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	hates the fall.

Dirk couldn't do it. Jake had broken up with him. He was the boy's universe and entire being. He was the better half of him. His shades were thrown on the floor as soon as he got home. He ran up the stairs and sat in his room. He couldn't even hate his self. It was the reason why Jake did it. He was too clingy. Of course. Dirk knew it on the inside of all this time. It shouldn't even be a surprise or as heart breaking. 

He heard a familar ding from his computer and sniffed. He walked to it and say it was Jake. He had messaged him twenty minutes ago. 

GT: Dirk?

GT: Hello? 

GT: Are you there? 

It pained him to read his name, but he didn't want Jake think he was clingy by being all blubbery. 

TT: Yeah. I'm just thinking

GT: Thinking about what, if i may ask? 

TT: Stuff. 

GT: So am i, but im thinking about what i did. 

One question rang throughout Dirk's mind and his fingertips allowed him to type it out.

TT: How you feel about it? 

There was at least a five minute pause. 

GT: Relief, of a sort. I guess 

And that's when Dirk Strider officially lost his cool. The message made him feel as if he had burnt alive and his love was stabbed with a sword. Of course he was relieved. He had got rid of his clingy ass. Jake deserved better. How foolish was he to think that Jake would ever love him? He closed the conversation and got up. He walked over to his bathroom. He opened up the medicine cabinet. He knew he had a hella of Opioids left.

About 5 months ago, him and Jake had went adventuring and Dirk had broke his leg. It had sent him into absolute hysterics so he needed strong pills that made him sleep. He didn't like taking them, he only took about 20 out of the 50. Now would come the time for the other 30. They helped stopped the pain and crying, maybe they'd permanently stop his pain now.

~

Jake felt terrible after sending that last message. He began to type an apology. He only didn't want Dirk to be broken up about him, no pun intended. He actually missed Dirk. He thought of the times when they were together. 

Like the first time Jake had seen Dirk without his shades. He was shocked, he'd admit. But he loved the color. They were a vibrant orange. He remembered it well.

~ 

Dirk looked at him hesitantly. 

"So...you don't think they're creepy?" 

"No, no. Not at all. I love them, actually. I love the colour orange. I used to love Fall back in England, I loved the leaves. And my grandma would make her pumpkin pies, as pumpkins were in season in time. Now, it reminds me of something else I love." Jake had told him, happily all while playing with his hand. 

"I used to hate Halloween. They used to always ask the teacher, "Can we carve Dirk? Is it okay for us to carve Dirk? What type of knife is used to carve Dirk?" So, I took their advice and decide the carve my self. It's one of the reasons I wear gloves." Dirk had painfully admitted to the boy. Jake didn't say it, but he appreciated that Dirk had finally admitted that to him. He felt as if it made their relationship stronger. 

~

Looking back, Jake realized how big of a mistake it was. He added a "Would you take me back?" and was about to hit send when he saw that he had stopped pestering him. It made Jake fill with worry. He tried to think of Dirk every hinting that he'd ever commit suicide. He only knew that he'd listen to music and cry his self to sleep in Jake's arms. Still, stuff gets tough at times. 

He was going to see if his boyfriend was okay.

~

When he arrived at Dirk's house, the door was open and his shades were on the floor. It made him worried for a quick second till he heard faint music from up stairs. He gave a small smile. Dirk was just sleeping. He walked up the stairs slowly, to not disturb him and recongized the song as soon as he heard the lyrics. It was "Say Something" by A Great Big World. It was one of the songs Dirk and him bonded over. They loved their song, I Dont Wanna Love Somebody Else. He walked over to the computer and changed it to that song. He pulled up a chair to his bed, and saw Dirk under the blankets. He looked so peaceful yet disturbed. He smiled a bit and said his name. 

"Oi, come on Dirk. I know you know I'm here. Come on, chum, wake up." When Dirk didn't as so much as stir, he laughed. He then started to hum the song with the music for a bit till he kind of worried about Dirk not waking. 

"Dirk?" He got up and saw something on his cheek and rubbed it off. As he did, he noticed that Dirk was as cold as a pole in the winter. He shook his head then the boy hard. 

"Dirk! Wake up, please! Dirk!" The mantra kept getting shouted, over and over and over again. But it was to no avail. Dirk wouldn't wake up. 

~ 

A few months later, it was fall. And he hated it. He wouldn't eat the pie, he wouldn't step on the leaves. He wouldn't carve the pumpkin. But the knife didn't go to waste.


End file.
